Do you ever feel that people don’t listen to you even though you are right? This statement described me to a tee early in my career. I was a master at what I did, technically sound was an understatement. But I couldn’t get buy-in. I would talk in a meeting and it was like I wasn’t even there. I discussed this with my wise mentor.
Me: I am very good at what I do, why don’t people listen to me?
My Mentor: Let me ask you a few questions. In these meetings, who is present? How many children do they have? What are their names? What hobbies do your colleagues have? Where do their parents live? Are they in good health? Where was the last family vacation? How do they take their coffee?
Me: Stop. I don’t know any of the answers to those questions. And how are they important in determining a pocket of over-pressurized gas at depth?
My Mentor: Everything!
Sadly, it was a few years later when I finally understood at a deeper level what she was talking about.
Mr. Earl Ludlow explained it to me in a way that I can’t forget, with a graph.
Mr. Ludlow, at the time was CEO of Newfoundland Power, he later went on to be Executive Vice-President of Fortis. Fortis is a St. John’s, NL based international diversified electric utility holding company with assets exceeding $49 Billion. I am illustrating this because he is a giant in the corporate world in North America.
In a fireside chat, Ms. Jocelyn Perry, who is now the CFO and Executive Vice-President of Fortis (also a giant in the corporate world), said that when she worked for Mr. Ludlow at Newfoundland Power, people would follow him around to ensure he was successful.
What an amazing statement to say about someone?
She went on to say that she visited a utility site with him. She describes it as a long drive to get to the site. As soon as they stopped driving, Mr. Ludlow pulled out a binder. He started studying. She peered over his shoulder, he was studying the names of all the employees and their photos. There were hundreds.
He didn’t just know their names, he knew their children’s names and personal information like what they did on the weekends.
What does Mr. Ludlow say about this?
The first time I met him, I was grateful to be in his presence. I didn’t want to take up too much of his time, so I got down to business within 2 sentences. He stopped me and took control of the conversation by asking me questions.
He asked: Where was I from? How did I get here in my career path? What did my parents do? What were my interests? What led me to this project?
What did he do? He listened.
Then we got down to business.
When we finished up, he continued by asking me about my education and why I choose this path.
After meeting him several times, I asked him the secret to connecting with people and he drew me a graph:
While drawing the graph Mr. Ludlow said:
“When you enter a conversation, always enter on the human side. Then proceed to the business at hand. Always exit on the human side. You will find that people will want to hear what you say, but only after you have made a real connection on the human side.” – Earl Ludlow, EVP Fortis
Words to live by if you want not only career success but having a deeper connection and quality relationships with your colleagues.
Carol
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